Tuesday, February 9, 2010

Learning to Say No

Are you suffering from mom or dad burn out? Are you struggling just to make it through each day? Moms (and Dads) everywhere are breaking down because they are too chicken or tired of constantly having to say, "No".

"No" may be a tiny, two-letter word, but it can be your secret weapon. And you can say it without feeling guilty saying it all the time.

Here are some ways you can say "no" without feeling guilty about it:

Sorry, I’m taking a break.
The number one reason why you should say, "no" occasionally is simply that you deserve a break. You are chef, dish washer, personal assistant and more. You job never ends on any given day of the week. You deserve a break. If you feel bad for saying "no", say, "Sorry, I’m taking a break".

My schedule is full.
We tend to jam-pack our schedule full of activities, leaving time for nothing. Cut back on your kids activities. Trade off playdates with another family giving you some down time.  Do whatever you can to free up some time in your schedule.

I have another commitment that day.
Say it and mean it. Regularly schedule in some alone time and if someone asks for your help during that time look at your planner (or pretend to) and tell them you have another commitment.

Instead of rushing to be everything to everyone, stop. Ask yourself if you truly have time for whatever comes up. If not, say no by walking away, turning off the ringer on the phone.

Always remember that you are a mom—not a super hero. When you have to say no, people will understand; if they don’t at first, they will get used to it eventually.

Editor's note: Still having trouble putting your foot down? Sometimes, we just need some extra guidance, a listening ear or a gentle and loving kick in the butt. You might want to give Aurelia Williams's free coaching session (affiliate) a go. She's a life coach and mom of 3 who has adult, teen and school age children so she definitely knows what she's talking about.


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